I Need A Friend Time (hb/ Ask)

Jenny had sent a message to Toji to see if he was willing to come and meet her over at the Bay bridge and luckily for her he like always was a good friend to call and he said he'd come and meet her. Jenny had been going through a lot lately and she was at a loss as to what truly to do. She blows out smoke as she sits on the ground of the bridge in the walk way area her feet dangling off the edge.

She leaned against the railing a bar between her legs and her arms laying lip on a lower bar. between her fingers of her right hand was a lit cigarette and her eyes zoned out as she looked at the sun set in the distance. The last Toji probably would have heard about her if Hotwire told him would have been that she returned her staff to Hotwire and claimed she was giving up on being a hero along with a sorry directed for Toji.

Soon after, Toji appears, grinning at Jenny."Ey,,,don't cha know those things are bad for ya?" He walks over, looking at her with concern. He'd been worried ever since receiving the sorry, but, well, he didn't know what to do. Now, though, she wanted him, probably needed him, and that's all that mattered.The halfling plops beside her, giving a hug.

Jenny looked to him then her cigarette and half halfheartedly laughed. "You know a cashier said that to me once... which was ironically right after i had to dig my way out of my own grave..." she smoked her cigarette a bit more looking back to the sun set. "Which about 4 days from now was exactly a year ago.... Happy early rebirth day I guess.."

She said staring off into the distance blowing out smoke. She hugged him back getting a bit teary eyed her ears drooping. "I don't know what I'm doing or what to do anymore Toji... I..... You know that girl I brought up to you a long while ago saying you two should meet? Well.... we had a complicated relationship and... just when I thought we finally were going to be together together...."

She looked down to her hands that where positioned like she was holding someone as a tear rolled down her cheek. "I held her in my arms... just like this... just like I did Laney..." more tears rolled down her cheeks as her voice shaked a bit. "And she said... she said Live.... and... and she died in my arms... I couldn't protect her toji.... I couldn't...."

Tears streamed down her cheeks. "But I knew I could keep going... people always die or leave me... and i even had my own place to live in right? Nope.... barely a week later as I was going back into my apartment a man was waiting on me... from some group that made nightingale and has a hard on for the work of the guy who made me..."

"They had a full team ready.... ready to take me way and do god knows what to me... and a guy came and saved me but... he blew up one of the only things I had left.... I got away but.... they're still looking for me..." she looked to her cigarette that was now a bud and sighed a bit tossing it away. "But I was like, I survived and I'm used to having to hide and run... I could still keep going... I can't live a normal life but I never had that option not even as a kid... and then.... "

"I saw her again... Lilith... the girl I loved but she also had the face of Laney.... but she wasn't herself... she was just some woman that Lilith had to work for or whatever.... she took her body.... and.... I was so mad... I was going to kill her... but stopped myself.... and the moment I let my guard down she tried to mess with my mind... she laughed at me as she left..... she laughed.... and it made me so angry.... Lilith never laughed...."

"So i had wanted to make her smile and laugh all the time... and the first time i saw her laugh was as someone else and at me...." tears rolled off her cheeks onto her legs. "I couldn't do it anymore... why fight for a world that clearly hates my existance... the one thing I wanted in life was a family... a normal and happy life... a kid.... and someone I could love and hold.... it is what dorve me even as a kid but back then it was just a happy life... but... each time I try to find love or happiness it's crushed...."

"Why fight for a word that won't even let me be happy....? So.... I gave hotwire the staff back.... I didn't... I dont want to be a hero anymore... even when I was one... all my efforts were over looked... when I was on the titans team I tried my best to be the best I could be... but it never seemed good enough.... Hotwire asked me if I was okay but.... I didn't want to talk to him about it.... why burden someone else about my issues right?"

"Why tell someone who the last time I talked to them was me shouting at him telling him how bad of a team mate he was as I left the team...? I... I just don't know what to do anymore.... life.... life is just becoming too hard to bare and it only gets worse.... I wanted to talk to you because... you're one of the only people I have left in this world...."

Toji listens, his own eyes glistening in empathetic pain. Oh Forger...She'd been through so much...He shudders, closing shut his eyes, then breathes out, hugging his friend tight."Y-you...you know...I...I had someone too...She...she was the first person in so long to hug me just cause...Not out of pity, not out of wanting to comfort, just cause she could...We..." He shakes his head, smiling fondly."We really liked each other...Over time we got together, you know? On our first date I was so freaking nervous. I went all out, wanting so bad to impress her....But, she was too busy having fun and getting me to have fun to have fun."

The halfling laughs."The date...or at least the eating part of it divolved into a food fight..I could feel a grin stretching across my face...I..I was so happy...Then, awhile later, she...." His fist clenches shut."She was murdered.I was so angry, so sad...Did you know, I wanted to...trade...myself for her. Life for life is fair, right?" The halfling let's out a bitter laugh."But it probably wouldn't have worked..Still, I was about to..then one of the Pack comes along. She holds me, and hugs me, telling me it'd be OK..Still, I hurt for awhile, didn't bother living. What was the point, if I kept getting hurt, if this world hated me enough to take away someone I felt like I belonged with?And the funniest thing? I wasnt just angry at my god, or the world...I was amgry at myself...It was. My fault, mine..

I functioned only at the bare minimum...But I eventually recovered, you know..Not to say I'm not messed up, cause I am...But I'm fighting back, I'm cleaning this world of ours up one scum at a time." He shakes his head."Sorry....I..I guess what I'm trying to say is I get it...You've had worse then me...At least someone isn't using my girls body like a suit, at least I haven't died several times...but still, I get it...And..and I am here, I'm here to help you keep walking, to say,"Its OK to step back and heal.." And I'll be here to help you fight back when you're ready...A-and, if you're k with it, though as messed up as I am I-I'm here to be your little bro."


( Fair warning Bow Toji is focusing on helping Jenny.^^)

Jenny cried as she hugged him back and nodded, she knew well that he had lost someone too that he cared about. She smiled partly she still hurt but she was glad that at least one of them had some happy memories to hold onto and smile about right now. She laughed a bit hearing about the food fight but looked down nodding.

She knew how he felt and in return he knew how she felt which was more than she could ask for in a friend... someone who knew the pain she felt. She looked down as he talked and chuckled a little as she looked down. "I only died once, but nearly died a lot but now isn't the time to 'brag' and that is the noble thing to do Toji but.... I don't think i'm coming back this time..."

"I hope you never get to this point but.... after years of having to literally drag my limb broke body with a half broken arm to get myself healed, Nearly dieing so many times.... constantly making friends and relationships just to have them back stab me and some die.... Never being allowed to settle down... Hell I tried to chase my dream of a happy life... i had toured the united states briefly while preforming my music just for it to be stopped to hear my family was killed....and each time i get close to a normal life... something destroys it..."

"I even had to watch as my own child was killed and taken from right out of me... it's just....it's hard to keep trying to move forward in life when the world tries to stop me... if you ever get to where i have gotten to... when you go through 18 years of constant pain... you'll truly understand why I find it so hard to try and figure out where I want to be in life... I hope you never get to where I am... when ever time you look at anything it just reminds you of something that haunts you... when ever you look at your hands you see nothing but blood..."

"When you close your eyes... all you see are the people you lost just staring you don't in disappointment at how far you fell... when each step you take it feels like you step down further on a stair case that brings you more pain... that despite how hard you run or fly away you just go deeper down... I hope you never have to feel this way little brother but... if you do you'll understand what I don't think I could ever return to the way I was... why I don't even think I can do anything without getting hit in the face. When everyone you have left..."

She looks to him her eyes running out of tears because of how much she cried. "When you look at them... despite how you or they feel about each other and do.... you'll just lose them.... because having them is too much to ask for...." she said the broken heart that broke to the point of being nothing but dust fell from her lips with each word she spoke. "All I want to do is protect you little brother... cause you're the closest thing I have left to family and you're one of the last things I have in my life... but I feel like if I stay too close to you... you'll leave me, or die... or you'll get hurt... and that's not fair to you to put you through that for only a brief moment of happiness...."

Toji's eyes close at her words.So much pain...He..he didn't know what he could do to heal it. The boy bites his lip, then grabs the bottom of his shirt, then takes it off, revealing the entirety of his torso. It was covered in scars, layered thick enough to serve as armor.He looks downwards, shaking slightly, before calming down. Focus on helping Jenny... Focus on helping Jenny..."U-uhm..As you can see...I'm used to hurt...And I'm not easy to kill...As for leaving you...A Okamian never leaves his pack, k? He stays, and he does his up most best to take the hits, and to help his family stand.So, don't worry, and don't bother, cause I'm not going anywhere."




( Let me know if that was a bit much, Mama E!!)

She looked at his scars and gasped a bit as she teared up at the sight. She gently felt along one on his side. She bit her lip a bit but slowly side her hand to his back as she gently pulled him close and hugged him gently holding the back of his head with her other hand. "Thank you little brother.... I don't think I'll be okay for a long time.... but.... with your help... I think I can get better eventually with time.... and maybe by then.... I can have the life I always wanted..."

Toji flinches as she feels a scar on his side, and he intakes a breath,shaking slightly.As she brings him into a hug, the halfling hugs her back."O-ok...I'll be there...However long you need it.I'll help you heal, as best as I can....So...so don't give up..." He pulls back to give Jenny a teasing grin."I didn't nearly get...what is it....beaned by a pigeon for nothing, you know."

Jenny held him as long as she could and smiling softly at his teasing and chuckled a bit before sighing wiping her cheeks with her sleeves. "Toji....? And I stay with you tonight...? and if its at the tower.... can you not tell anyone I was there....? I'd rather not spend tonight alone.... and... I also don't what to run into anyone else at the tower nor let them Know I was there.... you know considering what all happened the last two times I was there..." She asked looking down a bit.

Toji listens to her request,then nods with a gentle grin."Yeah, sure." That reminded him...he still needed to have a chat with HW, Meta, and Yang...The boy picks up his shirt, quickly pulling it back down over his torso and tugging at the collar to make sure it was upright." Well..let's go,then?"He gives her a hug, then hops back up.

she smiled softly and hugged him back "thank you..." she got up using the railign to help her up and would walk back with im mostly silently back to the tower. She really hoped she wouldn't run into anyone when she got there.