From Izzy

[5:20:31 PM]Over the past few days, I’ve had a lot of time to think. The day after I was banned I started to get very sick and, honestly, I thought it was anxiety. Turns out to be a bit of a virus. Whoops. Regardless, being unable to adjust to quick moving images has left me without videogames, without any intense television shows and cartoons, and the ban has left me with no way to post. So, it gave me time to just think.

I’ve gone over Energy’s post over and over in my head, on paper, and I’ve written about a dozen responses to each point. Responses to the point that people are tired of hearing about them for me. So to those who actually put up with it, I offer a sincere thanks. It’s very difficult for me to sit here and do nothing. Because of this ban and the confusion and pandemonium it brings, I’m in the middle of this Tib debate as well. Yet, unlike Tib or E or SN, I have absolutely no way to make my voice heard. It’s extremely frustrating, actually, to know that you have absolutely no voice, while everyone else can talk about you freely.

Tib, you haven’t been here for so long. I haven’t caused an issue for so very, very long. And yet, here the mods and acting admin come around, telling me I’m on my last warning. They have absolutely no proof to support saying I’ve been terrible over the past year, and yet they want year old skype logs from me to prove my improvement. Unreasonable request after unreasonable requests. All the while one of these mods is acting completely unprofessional, but I’m not able to say a word about it. You could see how that could get under someone’s skin, couldn’t you?

The most aggravating part of all is that, according to quite a few people I’ve spoken to, I’ve matured quite a bit since the days you’re talking about. When I joined this site, I honestly think I might have been 15, considering the account I lost the password to was created in early May. So yeah, 15. Today, I’m 19. I’m older, I’ve learned a lot from my time here, and I was hoping you’d learned that during all the talks we’d had. You went out of your way to show me that you were my friend, and evidently you’d never meant any of that. However, I digress.

In response to each of the points that Energy brought up, I actually wrote another small novel for you all, but couldn’t exactly post it in response. For one thing because of the IP ban I’m now plagued with, but for another because the original topic was locked, stopping anyone from speaking their mind, a trend that myself and many other members are clearly not very fond of.


Multiple Accounts: 
I have made two accounts for personal use over my time here. The first was abandoned after less than a year, because I lost the password. While I did successfully recover it later, I never used the account again. I left the characters and posts completely behind. The other accounts were me attempting to acquire answers. And if you’re talking about the Remy (Faye) account, it was made for Faye. There’s a reason it barely got used.

Rude: 
I am very rarely rude; in fact, I feel the word you should have used is “crude”. I have a very raunchy sense of humor, and some people don’t get that. I respect their stances and any person who has ever asked me not to make those jokes, I’ve never done it around them again. Simple.

Banned from Chat: 
I don’t see how this is relevant. At all. The last time I was banned was for a Grammar Nazi joke, because it was a Nazi pun. And it was for all of 20 minutes.

Inappropriate with Others: 
First of all, mkay, I apologized up and down to you for like, a week. It was laggy, and I apologized. This is NOT something you should bring up in this. What I do privately with other women is between me and that woman. This took place TWO. YEARS. Ago, and it should not be relevant now. I have matured, and as have you. We have moved on.

Inappropriate in RPs: 
OK that’s just…not even true. If you’re talking about how every now and again Yang makes a joke about the Japanese, that’s the type of character she is. I have never made a truly cruel joke at anyone’s expense.

Takes IC Things Too Seriously: 
Once again, I hit on you ONCE. It isn’t relevant. Do not assume it is. One instance in which I reacted in a certain manner toward you so long ago is not a defining attribute of my character. The only other time I’ve tried to start a relationship with a member of the site is Bloo. You can ask her about it, I don’t think she finds it at all displeasurable.

Titans Tower: 
The fact of it was that I took a small leave of absence and was told to leave the team entirely, and to leave the tower to Hotwire. Little did you all know, this is also what sparked the destruction of the Titans Tower during the war. Again, without asking anyone. Weird how that gets glossed over, isn’t it? Disgustingly enough, it was a small leave. And they wanted me to get out the second I got back. Would you be happy about that? Hotwire came to me and made an honest attempt to help both of us, and I accepted it. In fact it was probably for the better considering how much fun Hotwire and I have had with the Titans since the co-leader thing.

Members Leaving: 
If anyone else feels this way about my influence, tell me. If this is an issue that has been rectified several times over, I don’t see how it’s relevant.

Horrible Influence: 
Excuse me? I tell members not to blow up like I do, because I’m lucky that people understand my current situation. I advise them against what I do, that’s the opposite of a bad influence.

Disrespectful: 
This isn’t even true. I am immensely respectful toward Hotwire, Kyte, Kardus, and up until now Tib. Tib has lost my respect after going behind my back and trying to silence the masses. The only other outliers are Moon, SN, and Energy herself. Up until now, I was under the clear understanding that Moon and Energy despised me above all else. I thought they couldn’t stand me due to things I’ve heard from, strangely enough, Tib. I’ve talked to him about how much he regrets putting on his current mods. I’ve talked to him about how much he wishes that ENERGY weren’t the only option he had as someone to promote. It left a rather poor taste in my mouth for them. Now, we are better friends than ever. 

Inappropriate Pictures: 
That was a one-time thing, and you’re not even being fully honest. The full story is that Mega posted a rather small gif in the chat, screaming internally was the gif. It was very small, had little to no motion, and he was reprimanded for it. It caused no issues for my computer, nor for Hotwire’s. However, when I stepped forward and, in a very respectful tone, said that it was all in good fun and there wasn’t a problem with it, I was told it doesn’t concern me. So, playing to the grammar Nazi joke (as humor is one of my tools to calm myself), I told them to stop being such a Chat Nazi. I jokingly posted the Nazi flag, and didn’t expect people to be so offended by it. I have apologized to Hotwire in person for it, and I don’t see Mega enough to apologize if he was offended. In retrospect, a PM probably would have been nice. Energy I was still under the impression despised me, so I avoided her entirely for the next month or so.


For a majority of these things, either they haven’t happened in well over a year, or I apologized up and down for months trying to smooth it over. I like a lot of the people I’ve known for quite some time, and if you’d come up for a bit of air, maybe you could stand to meet me as the person I am today.

I firmly believe that about a year or two ago if I’d been banned, no one would have batted an eye. I was a brat, and that’s very clear. But with how I’ve grown as a person with Bow, Hotwire, Bloo and Amon, I like to think that I’ve gained the respect of at least one or two people here. At the very least th..

When you banned me, you thought you made the right yet unpopular choice. To a degree, I can respect that. However, a role playing forum isn’t the place to make a choice of that nature. When we come here, we all want to enjoy ourselves, and there are a fair number of people who enjoy roleplaying with me. Why? Honestly, I have literally no idea. But when you take away that option from people, despite what the group agrees upon, you create a serious problem in the air of that forum. You create a beast that’s going to run rampant.

Now, as I’ve said before, if you would come up for air and meet me as I am today, I’m not the same spoiled brat anymore. Especially during my time with Yang, I’ve learned a lot of responsibility. I’ve learned so much during my time here, and it seems quite a bit like you are spitting on all of that progress on behalf of the staff.

Now…we get to my point about standing down. Admittedly, I was using Faye’s account to lurk about on this forum. A lot of people would say that’s wrong, but I was incredibly concerned. I had no idea what was going on in the chat at any given time, and it’s unnerving to have that issue. During that time however, I did not vote on your position as admin. I felt that, considering I was banned, it wasn’t my place to vote. I didn’t even voice a single opinion on the matter on the forum. However, I think it’s for the best that you do so.

When I was having so much trouble in High School, you were the only one helping me. You helped me pass Algebra, you helped me through History, you even took half of my Trig final for me. For those I will always be grateful. However, something sticks out quite a bit in my head. While we worked on History, it was basically war after war, and each one was started by a stubborn man at the helm of his country. I don’t want to see you be that stubborn man who starts a war Tib. I really don’t.

If anything about this seems disrespectful, it's because this is what a very heated Izzy looks like these days. I'm upset, I'm frustrated, and this is very difficult for me. I'm simply stating my issues as best I can, and taking what may very well be the only chance I get to defend myself.