Father Broec

OOC: Right, this is a rough draft. If he makes it through, I'll probably make a new profile or something so I don't confuse anybody with the two characters.

Profile:

Name - - - Lucas Broec

Title - - - Father Broec

Occupation - - - Chaplain

Race - - - Astertes, ie, Genetically engineered supersoldier

Height - - - Nine foot one(unarmored) Nine foot three(armored)

Eyes - - - Steel grey

Hair - - - Short cropped black

Appearance - - - His armor is black, and his breastplate has been sculpted into the likeness of a human ribcage which is a creamy off white in color. Similar in fasion to his breastplate, his helmet is masterfully crafted in the likeness of a human skull, however instead of empty eyesockets, his helm features glowing red optics and instead of a grin, a fanged maw screams in silent hatred. In stark contrast to the rest of his armor, his right arm is the unpainted gunmetal silver of the rest of his chapter from the shoulder plate down.

Equipment/explanation of equipment - - -
Power armor: Thanks to his rank it is Artificer made, meaning it's stronger than normal Astartes armor. Very bulky, but moves with the wearer thanks to an implant called the Black Carapace - a hardened shell beneath an Astartes' skin that surrounds his vital organs which both allows for better protection and is wired into nervous system, allowing it to connect with armor through various ports.
Storm bolter: Mounted on his left wrist, it is protected by an armored outcropping. It is basically a twin barreled bolter and fires self propelled armor piercing explosive rounds at a high rate of fire.
Rosarius: A holy relic given only to the highly esteemed Chaplains, a Rosarius is an icon, usually an amulet, that projects a personal energy field. Lacking the power to fully stop a ranged attack, it instead is designed to redirect rounds away from the wearer. For example, any ranged attack from a projectile smaller than a baseball has a roughly thirty percent chance of missing and a forty percent chance of scoring a much less harmful glancing blow. The Rosarius has no effect on attacks from within ten feet and has difficulty dealing with attacks from within twenty feet. The Rosarius has no effect on melee attacks.
Jump pack: A powerful engine between two massive thrusters. Capable of launching even the immense bulk of an Astartes upon death defying leaps over the battlefield. Note, a jump pack is not a jet pack, and is unable to provide sustained flight.
Crozius Arcanum: A large, master crafted mace whose head has been shaped into a twin headed eagle. Only given to Chaplains as a symbol of their rank. Incorporates a powerful energy field capable of cutting through thick armor. An easy way to think about it is to imagine the Crozius as a lightsaber with a mace inside.
Daemonic wards: Grey Knights are dedicated to hunting down and killing the unholy. As such, runes are carved on the outside edges of their armor and tattooed across their flesh. These wards glow with a golden light in the presence of the unholy, causing a fierce burning sensation that worsens the closer the unholy enemy moves to the Grey Knight.These wards, while useful against unholy adversaries, are useless against everyone else as only unholy characters are subject to the effects. Random note: unless active, the tattooed wards are barely visible and can only be seen when the viewer is mere inches away. In addition, when close enough to a powerful source of unholy energy, the wards can burn bright enough to burn the Grey Knights' flesh, though this rarely effects the Knight's ability to fight.
Abilities - - - All Grey Knights are psychic and Broec is no different. He has access to a few powers.
Divine lightning: After a moment's concentration and a quick prayer, Broec can cast a single volley of lightning either from the sky or from his fingertips.
Holy light: Intense concentration and fevered prayer produce a painfully blinding light.
Litany of Hate: Broec can rile himself up with loudly shouted prayers. These have a demoralizing effect upon enemies and a morale boosting effect upon allies.
Note on powers: Both Divine lightning and Holy light require roughly a post to prepare and use, no other action is available during preparation or usage of either of these two powers with the exception of blocking, though doing so will interrupt concentration and weaken power of ability. As both use a tremendous amount of energy, they are generally only available once to twice as a whole over the course of a battle. As all three abilities are fueled by faith, they are much more effective against unholy adversaries such as demons, causing far more damage than when used upon a normal foe. In the same manner, if Broec somehow found himself fighting a holy adversary, such as an angel, his psychic abilities would be less effective.

Bio - - - Father Lucas Broec has survived hellish warzone after hellish warzone for centuries, diving headfirst into daemon worlds to protect the Imperium from becoming a living incarnation of Hell. He is always the first to enter the fray and the last Marine to leave the planet. He is found where the fighting is thickest, inspiring his men to ever greater acts of selfless heroism as he soars above the battlefield on wings of fire.His past has been erased by order of His Divine Inquisition.

Note: As an Astartes, Broec benefits from various bionic and organic implants, the list of which is quite lengthy. However, I can still post it if necessary.

DENIED

Sorry to say this, but SilentNight, hadn't I been subtle enough yet clear that you should try to fit it in the TT style? It's THE reason why I dislike the 40k chars. No offence, they're built nicely, but this is no 40k RP forum. Even if we go a bit into another direction, it's still Teen Titans. Seems this would pass, as the character himself is quite alright, on said 40K forums, but not here. I apologise, I had thought you'd get it to fit beter then it does now. The more I read it, the more I thought it wasn't alright. There's no dealing with the 40k slang as well, it seems.

Try to get it right. Try and be creative, pull it into another direction. As it is now, it won't get an approval. Even moreso, it makes me doubt Grim and the Primarch as well. More of this is sure to follow.

~Emblem

You were, though I wasn't really sure how to mesh him as his story line involves a time portal. Honestly Ida been shocked had he made it. As for 40k slang, I know what you mean, but it's the name of something. There's not much changing that can be done, hence I tried my best to explain everything. I merely posted it on that one percent chance it would work.

It can, I doubt if not. Give it a try