Toji: pulp noir detective!!!!!( please review)

Folks, this is the introduction to a fanfiction I been thinking of lately.It shows Toji as a halfdemon detective in 2369 Jump City. I hope you like it!!!!!

Names Toji Okami, one of the last freelancing P.I's in the world, and the only one in Jump. I've been on rough cases before, but this one takes the cake and shoves it into my face. It started when that dame walked through my office door.I should know better by now, exspecially as this one was a obvious femme fatale,with long dark hair, big brown eyes, and dressed with clothes set to stun. But what can I say? I'm a sucker for pretty faces that need help. All she had to do was look at me, and I was hooked, collared, and begging for a bone.I played it cool, though. Leaning back in my seat, I say,"What you need, madam? What can I do?" She sat down nervously, adjusting an odd pendant on her neck. It was engraved with an archaic symbol, obviously cyber-occultic."Mr. Okami, I need......Wait, how old are you?" I sigh. Always happens, someone questions my ability to deliver, just becuase of my age."16, madam. But trust me, I can do what needs done. Now, what do you need." She nods, then says," Somebodies trying to kill me. I need you to figure out who. I-I'll pay."I nod, already deciding to ask for the minimum amount."Alright, when the case is over, I'll ask for my pay. Now, here's a safe house owned by a buddy of mine. You'll be safe there......." An half hour later, I'm going to a club. I like it becuase there's a trustworthy informer of mine there most nights. Entering Quatom Hammer, I walk over to a table in the back , nudging Johhnie Busts awake. Glaring at me, he says,"What you need, boyo?" I tell him the situation, and he nods." Okay, I'll keep my ear to the ground."Walking out of the club, I yawn, eager to head to bed.A gorilla grabs me, putting me into the headlock."Drop the case, or die.now, good night!!!!!" Their grip tightens, and my vision fades. Lights out on Jump city.....

4 out of 5 stars! A little confusing in the end but still good!

-KipReviews.

(looks atvthge date...Woah, forever, huh?Anyways, I'll include another entry!! sorry for the delay, my friends.)

I wake up, groaning.I felt like someone had put on steel boots and danced the polka on my neck. Sitting up, I spit." Blasted ape...least he could have done was know hot to do it right." I clamber up, growling. They shouldn't have done that...Before, I was calm and steady, but now I was a raging fire itching to burn somebody.I check my pockets, making sure I got everything. Extending, dark steel sword, trap chain, Amp pistol, varsity of things that made bogies hiss...Check,check,checkity check. Sighing in relief, I head home. As I enter my house, my snarky A.I beeps at me." Hello, boss,welcome home. Good night?" I give him, or rather his holoscreen, a glare." Not now, alright? I got cyber occultists to look up." He then promptly gives me a raspberry." Don't you mean I? Since you know, your researching consists of you ordering me around and reading manga?" I chuckle." Hey, its your job." Jarvis hmms." I guess youre right...Just like I'm supposed to take calls. Oh look, your sister Grace is calling!!!" I look up, my eyes bugging out worse than a paranoid survivalist seeing black vans." You wouldn't...REFUSE, REFUSE!!" Jarvis cackles." Too laaaaate..." His face disappears, and a holograph beams out, resolving into a full sized image of my foster, Grace.Light blue eyes look at me as she brushes back a strand of her long dark hair." Toji..just calling to check up on you...The family's worried about you in the city by yourself...Are those bruises around your neck?" I blink." No..no..Uhmm, just a mistake, probably in your relay. You should get thgat checked..." She narrows her eyes." I'm coming over, little brother." She abruptly signs off,and I pale. To be sure, she was kind to me, if slightly disant at times, but she was terrifying upset, especially since she was a ice mage. I felt a sensation like a cold chain slither down my back, and shiver, sighing as the door bell brings." What now..." As I open the portal to my sanctuary, my next door neighbor Ruin breezes in."Hey, Toji! Howcare you,huh?" I blink,grinning." Uhm..I'm good! Howcare you, Ru?" She smiles, giggling." Oh, I'm fine. Brought you some food!" I blink." IH..uhm, you didn't have to do that, really." She gives me a hug." If I didnt, you'd starve. You're too focused to bother buying food.Beside, I made too much anyways." I blink, grinning sheepishly. I didn't know what it was about her, but she always managed to knock me faster off balance than a earthquake. Clearing my throaght, I nod." Thanks..really." She nods,beaming as she kisses me on the cheek." No problem...be safe, okay? I'll visit later." I nod dumbly, scratching my cheecj, and she hugs !e one last time, exiting. Sniffing, I try desperately to hold back the Atlantic rolling around in my mouth as I open the contrainer. Under realm fish, marianted in elvish special sauce. I pick up the plastic fork she included, only to hear shouts outside. Dropping it, I run faster than a cheeta treated to coffee, exiting to see two cyber demons harassing Ruin." Tell us where the bluehaired halfling is, or you'll regret it, abomination!" I pull my amp pistol, whistling. One looks up, only to get a marble of tightly concentrated lightning to the head, banishing instantly. The other growls, pulling a knife and pointing it at Ruin, only to have that dfissappear as I pur a round it it." Have you no honor?" I briefly consider, then shake my head." Nope!" Banishing him, I walk over to Ruin." Ru....you okay?" She nods, hugging me.* Yes..thanks, Toji." Letting tho, she smiles briefly before entering her own home. I bend over, rummaging through the ashes,before finding a pendent similar to the woman's. But...it..I dontbknow..it seemed \meaner\.I stand up, gripping the pendent. Alright, I'm running our of patience faster than the Queen of Hearts. But, I wasn't about to lose my head. I reenter my house, looking at Jarvis." Let's get started."


(k, as you can guess, this is a mixture of olkd Toji, and new Toji. Tell me what you guts think!^^)