Teen Titans Legacy

A RPG (Role Playing Game) based shortly after the original Teen Titans TV series. Choose or create a character and get stuck in the action!
 
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 Brute[Ready]

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AuthorMessage
Shadowwalker
Zeta-class Metahuman
Zeta-class Metahuman


Posts : 492
Join date : 2016-11-16

RPG character
Name: project renegade
Code Name: ren
Villain or good guy?: Neutral

PostSubject: Brute[Ready]   Tue Jun 06, 2017 9:58 am

"dieings easy livings hard"

Dominic waren Blackstone



«««IDENTITY»»»

Full Name:Dominic Blackstone
Nickname(s):
Codename:
Alias(es):brute
Age:27
Race: Human
Alignment: evil


«««PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION»»»

Hair Color:black
Eye Color:black
Gender:male
Height:6"3
Weight:150lbs
Other Traits:wears a custom mask


«««SKILL SET»»»

disclaimer said magic is a mixture of both bio manic and teleconisis

Spells Charge a mixture of teleportation and energy that when put into contact with a target renders it incapacitated if target has no powers

Pull: a telecanetic leash that pulls the target to user only works on organic mass
,
Throw only works on non organic mass up to 500 lbs: allows user to telecaneticly throw target up to500 pounds 20 ft
, Singularity :mini minipulation of targets mind forcing them to think they can't move mostly out of fear

Slam: ability to manipulate the ground with telecanetic energy to form a shockwave that moves out about 6 feet in diameter

, Warp to warp organic and non organic material up to 20 pounds to youser as long as it's withen 12 feet



Skills
-{Any number of mundane skills you want (e.g. able to drive a car, hairdresser, good singing voice) but a limited amount of 'exceptional' skills melee expert :blades, parkour  , handgun marksman, user of biotechnology magic

Physical Weaknesses
cold and or water - user is more weak to the cold and water giving he or she sever burns

Mental Weaknesses
A lack of consept of death


Equipment
throwing knifes and large bandaleer for them , single shot breech loading .500 pistol
Kevlar vest, 30ft of retractable garrat wire

«««CEREBRAL PROFILE»»»


Personality
-angrey after spending time in both the hospital from his injurys and finding out his little cousin Reina killed after spending time with renagade
Likes
-caramel ice cream

Dislikes
-people that get between him and his revenge

Habits/Hobbies
smokes plays video games



«««PERSONAL BACKGROUND»»»


Family Members: Reina :cousin
Place of Origin: jump city
History
was a nice kid normal life normal family and everything was going great up until his 18th birthday, his family got into financial trouble due to his fathers gambling and was offered a large sum of money for their only son dominic  due to their current status they agreed the people who purchased  Joseph was a group called the hive who in turn suspected Joseph to dozens of viral diseases then making him fight the other projects the winner of said fights gets cured of their viruses this was the process Joe had to live with for the next 8 years  when he had turned 26 his body was stronger faster and could take more punishment then ever due to the overwhelming amount of viral pathogens exposed to his body had in a sense evolved it fearing that the hive my not be able to control him had him killed and put it a tomb in Gotham cemetery



however that was not the end of Joesph his soul unable to rest with the hatred and sorrow of what they did to him and metting Reina in the after life, one of the four horseman known to many as war decided to help aid this man and returned him to the land of the living giving him a new outfit and mask the outfit itself warrants fear and dread to his enemy's as his mask shows the emotionless expression of a killer he is now and a set of powers of equal pain and hatred as its user



dawning his new persona as reaper the man decided that he must kill the hive and all that help and or share the same views he uses a black energy like powers that most would call spells and will mostly kill his targets silently and swiftly but if things do get loud hes not afraid to hack his way threw anything he deems hostile




«««Sample RP»»»

-{Only required if you've never gotten a character approved before. Minimum 2 paragraphs.}


Last edited by Shadowwalker on Mon Aug 07, 2017 6:29 am; edited 2 times in total
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Megabot
Beta-class Metahuman
Beta-class Metahuman
avatar

Posts : 1170
Join date : 2012-11-14
Age : 27
Location : Everywhere and nowhere

RPG character
Name:
Code Name:
Villain or good guy?: Neutral

PostSubject: Re: Brute[Ready]   Tue Jul 04, 2017 12:36 am

Character saying is a copy of your last one. Is this intentional?

He has no codename or nickname written down.

Side note: So he's using Necromancy?


Invisibility: So does it function like bad Halo Camo? Also does he become visible at all when attacking or casting spells?

Lightning Bolt: 10 souls for a lightning bolt. Is it actually a lightning bolt or does it just appear as one? Because one is as fast as light, which is normally impossible to dodge. And it happens when he snaps his fingers, which has little warning. Even if the number of souls required was increased, I cannot with good reason allow an attack that is (in my mind currently) at the speed of the light with the mere snap of the fingers. I'm also not comfortable allowing it with a charge simply because it's a lightning bolt. Which normally kill people with one shot.

Lightning Strike: -points to above critique-

Speedy Recovery: If he's on the brink of death, how would he be able to cast this spell? And what exactly does that mean in regards to the conditions needed for it to work?

Other Side note: How did you plan on keeping track of these souls? Do they carry over? Because while I have no problem with it personally, did you intend on him just randomly killing a bunch of people in every single thread he's in? Not sure how other players would feel about that.

Weaknesses: it seems like you copy and pasted this from some where. Also, you're lacking 1 mental weakness and have also failed to describe how exactly he's insane, or what he's liable to do because he is insane.

Personality: Okay, he's crazy... and cocky. Are there any other character traits you'd like to mention here?

_________________
2/19/17[10:10:25]Mega: You Bloo it there [10:10:46]@ Bloo: Shut up
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Shadowwalker
Zeta-class Metahuman
Zeta-class Metahuman


Posts : 492
Join date : 2016-11-16

RPG character
Name: project renegade
Code Name: ren
Villain or good guy?: Neutral

PostSubject: Re: Brute[Ready]   Mon Aug 07, 2017 6:29 am

Edited
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Megabot
Beta-class Metahuman
Beta-class Metahuman
avatar

Posts : 1170
Join date : 2012-11-14
Age : 27
Location : Everywhere and nowhere

RPG character
Name:
Code Name:
Villain or good guy?: Neutral

PostSubject: Re: Brute[Ready]   Yesterday at 12:20 am

Right, I have some bad news. There's been a trend with your character apps and I haven't been the only one to notice it. This character is very similar to your other characters. Specifically Ren and Reina. His character saying is practically identical to Reina's as a matter of fact. If you need some more examples I can find them. But I digress. We of staff have decided that we will no longer accept apps of this quality. Spelling errors, grammatical errors, and coding errors are just a few of the problems with this app and the ones before it. There are also scarce details about "brute" as a person. I'd also like to point out that his codename and nickname sections are completely blank, a problem I wanted you to fix with Reina.

So what we are looking for now is for you to put more work into this app. Fix the grammatical and spelling errors, fill in ALL of the identity fields with none or N/A- your choice, remove (-{Any number of mundane skills you want (e.g. able to drive a car, hairdresser, good singing voice) but a limited amount of 'exceptional' skills) and place each item in an organized list using the list coding, have more then 1 mental weakness, flesh out his personality more (150 words please), add more likes, and add more dislikes/habits and hobbies. And please, make him more different then Ren and Reina because as I said, he's very similar to them. Also, please give him a character saying that is UNIQUE to him and not a 1 word difference to Reina's.

No staff member will be rechecking this app/giving you feed back on it until these changes are made.

_________________
2/19/17[10:10:25]Mega: You Bloo it there [10:10:46]@ Bloo: Shut up
My Characters
Weaver: cornflowerblue
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Shadowwalker
Zeta-class Metahuman
Zeta-class Metahuman


Posts : 492
Join date : 2016-11-16

RPG character
Name: project renegade
Code Name: ren
Villain or good guy?: Neutral

PostSubject: Re: Brute[Ready]   Yesterday at 1:04 am

Will do mega i apologies for lack of trying im just really depressed since my aunt died
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