Dating Diary <3 (Bow)

Dear Diary,

So, I know I haven’t written in you since…well…since I got you after my first trip to the hospital, but this last time made me think of you. I want to make sure I remember everything. I’m so scared that I’m going to wake up one day in one of those disturbingly white, sterile rooms, with no one around and nothing in my head but questions. That was the worst feeling in the world.

This last trip was almost just as bad though…

I hated seeing them fight, Diary. And now… I’ve lost JaK forever. I think that might be a good thing though… He had already left me for almost half a year. Right after we confessed to each other. I told him I would be his anchor! I waited for him! I had lots of other options, but I told them no because he said that he would be back for me.

I thought that meant that he was saving himself for me too. But I guess I was wrong. Three other women had his heart while on the other side of the world. And I’m sure they were all leaps and bounds better than I ever will be. Then they died. I feel bad for him, I do. I’d like to stay friends, but I’ve realized that… maybe he wasn’t the best option for me. I think I need someone more normal…

Like Adam! We’ve been volunteering at the Soup Kitchen together for about three months now and I’ve definitely noticed the way he acts around me. He’s concerned for me. It’s soooo sweet! He says that I should try giving his world a try… I wonder what he really means by that… But I’ve decided to give it a try! We’re going on our first real date tomorrow <3

I’m so excited! I can’t wait!

Love ya and see ya soon!
-Rain

P.S. – He says he likes my first name better. I think it’s adorable!

Dear Diary,

Our date went amazing! We connected so well! We even kind of matched! I wore a soft purple sweater and he wore a beautiful lavender tie! We talked about everything from volunteering to our hobbies to me heroing... He didn't seem to fond about that though. He seemed to get a little darker when I spoke about fighting bad guys and getting injured.

Then he came off with maybe I should quit the Titans. I think he was just joking though! I giggled and we switched off of that subject completely. He keeps making little comments about me being normal though. I'm not sure if I should tell him that I'm half alien or not... I think I'll save that information for later.

I've never been in a relationship with a simple human before... Actually, I've never been in a real relationship ever. Period. Not that I can remember at least... I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING!!! All I know is that I don't want to lose him. I'm tired of losing everything. I'm done. I... I'm going to do whatever it takes to keep him...

Until next time,
Rain

Dear Diary,

It's been about two weeks since I've written in you, but that's just because I've been spending so much time with Adam! He's just so wonderful! He says he can't get enough of me. So sweet, right!? He wants all of my time, my love, my attention. He's becoming more and more of the ground that I stand on... Sure, it's a little scary to say that. Especially considering my past, but, I trust him. He's the most normal thing I've ever had in my life and... I think I love normality! I never thought I would actually say that, but it's true. It's so easy, comfortable, simple.

I don't even think that my team has noticed my absence. I never was a big part of the Titans anyway. I was just the first person Kale saw the day he built the tree. Speaking of Kale, he's already risked his life enough for me. I'm starting to think that it would be best for everyone if I just... disappeared. I'm just a burden as a hero. Maybe as a...human...I could actually do something to benefit everyone! That's what Adam thinks too. He's so smart!

He says that he really wants to see my hair dyed a more "natural" color... I think I might try to be a brunette. That would help me blend in in the normal world, right? Yeah... I think I'm gonna do that... Maybe next week.

I love him so much!
-Rain

Dear Diary,

I'm spending the night with Adam again tonight! I just dyed my hair and he absolutely loves it!! He also met Kale... I'm not entirely sure they got along though. The entire drive back to his house, Adam just kept talking about getting me out of there. I know he doesn't like it, but I do. I don't wanna leave my home yet. But I'm sure everything will be alright!

Kale loved my hair too! Which makes me really happy. I was worried that he wouldn't like it, and his approval is really important to me too. Just like Adam's. I really do hope that one day they'll be able to get along better...

Well, can't stay for long! Adam's taking me to dinner and a movie!

Until next time!
-Rain

Dear Diary,

...Humans show love in very mysterious ways. Adam he... he hit me. We were talking about whether or not I was going to stay for the week or not. I told him that I needed to go back to my home. He started yelling, saying that those freaks aren't my family. That the tree is no home. I-I couldn't help myself. I yelled back at him. He's wrong. This group of teens is the most like a family that I've ever known.

He didn't like my response. He said that he cared more about me than they did because he's trying to get me out of all of that. The fighting, he means. And he's right in some aspects. I really don't like to fight. I don't want to hurt anyone, but at the same time, I want to protect people more than I hate hurting the ones causing the fight.

He started the fight tonight though. When I started to pack to go back home, he came in and that's when it happened. He threw all of my clothes on the floor and then punched me right in the eye. I hit the ground. He didn't even try to catch me. But...

Then he sat down and apologized. He cried as he said he was sorry. That he didn't mean to do that. He just got over emotional... Because he loves me so much. It's actually sweet when you think about it, huh? He cares so deeply for me that to show how much he wants me to stay with him, he accidentally hurt me.

He loves me. And I love him.

Yeah.

Night, Diary.
-Rain Bow

Dear Diary,

JaK. I saw JaK. JaK saw me. He pulled me out of a crowd to sing to kids. He didn't realize it was me until I started singing. I don't think he would have if my hair was still pink. He's been in my head all day. I haven't been able to concentrate on anything else. I'm so lucky that Adam is working late tonight. I don't think I could keep a straight face right now. I've been crying all afternoon. I'm such a wimp.

He saw my eye… And told me I should tell my team, or kick his butt myself. I don’t think I ever could though. I’m not violent like everyone else around me. I much prefer to use my words… But with JaK… I lose those words. I can never win against myself win it comes to him. But he is right. I have to do something about Adam. I can’t allow him to hit me again. But what do I do?

I really do cherish him. There’s a reason I agreed to be his girlfriend. He takes care of me and I do believe that he really does love me. So I can’t just leave him. We need to work through this…

Speaking of working through things though, JaK said something about a promise that is keeping him away from me. And for me to ask Kale. I may not be the most confrontational, but I plan to be when I get back home! I have to know. Maybe he’ll explain why JaK left me at the hospital.

…Maybe it really wasn’t his choice…

I have so many things to think about and do. I’ll let you know when I accomplish them.

Until we meet again.
-Rain Bow