Hello darlings,
I know by now I'm sort of "That Titan that comes and goes sporadically" and I'm sorry about that, you guys should have reliable RP-partners.
So to explain my absences and their randomness I mae this post.
I've been on this site...so long, I never really thought about how long, but wow. So much has happened and changed. I've been here for years. I think I was fourteen-fifteen when I started. Now I'm a legal adult (in europe anyway) and my life and my self are different than when I started. But because I've been a part of this so long it means a lot to me. And I feel worse for it for neglecting you all.
My active-status was and perhaps still is very tied to my mental state. So I never get bored of you all, I just had a breakdown. Or two. Or twenty. I just had my biggest breakthrough in Therapy for cutting, an ED and suicide attempts and since I've been working on that for a while with my therapist and coaches and doctors I've not had the time to juggle RPing in my week of meds, therapy, my american academics, my german academic school, dance school, functioning as the 'Captain' of my theater Troupe, working on films with screenwriters and training with my band. Heck, I'm glad I could still do any of those.
Of course, there are times when I couldn't. And I wish I could have managed to squeeze RPing in there, but that schedule plus 5+ suicide attempts, relapses, an accidental overdose (which was quite ironic since I was in a good state when that happened) and marks that are now battle scars on my wrist I just couldn't.
I still can't promise not to disappear again, but now I can at least promise that I will definately always return.
I'm so, so sorry, for being shitty unreliable. I really am. I love his place, I have my friends here, I adore just about everyone really. so I apologise.
Love,
Mags